Does it seem like conversations end up being about her?
Does she have intense friendships that don’t ever seem to last for many years?
Does she play the victim?
Is she quick to criticize, yet she reacts strongly when she is criticized?
Does she need attention or affirmations all the time?
Does she show she doesn’t understand how you think or feel?
Does she seem to be frequently involved in “misunderstandings?”
Does she act hurt or angry when you make decisions without her?
Does she give you gifts that you don’t want?
Is she able to let you win (games, disagreements, etc.)?
Does she act jealous of you?
Does your mother do nice things for you only when someone will see it or find out?
Does your mother make you responsible for her feelings?
Is your mother controlling or tries to involve herself in nearly every aspect of your life?
Do you struggle to make decisions about things that involve her?
Does she compete with you?
When something difficult happens in your life, does she only talk about how it will impact her?
Does she frequently have to “one-up” you? (Example: She has the best story, the most significant impact, the most challenging problem, etc.)
Do you avoid telling her about your feelings and things that happen?
Do you feel uncomfortable with how your mother talks about you or describes you to others?
Do you feel she values you more for what you do than who you are?