Do I Have Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome?
Take the Quiz to find out!

Do you wonder…

 if you’re in a narcissistic relationship?

if you’re experiencing abuse by a narcissist?

if you are experiencing impacts from toxic parents?

if you see warning signs that someone’s toxic behaviors are deeply harming you?

Being in a long-term relationship with a narcissist is devastating to our whole being and can cause Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome.

Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome is the name given to a group of symptoms that can occur from a long-term relationship with an individual with significant narcissistic traits.   

Did you develop Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome from being in a long-term toxic relationship with a narcissist?  

Take the following Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome Quiz or Test to find out. 

DIRECTIONS:  

Please read each statement carefully, then select the answer that shows how frequently you experience each item in a past or present long-term relationship with a toxic individual.

DISCLAIMER:   

It’s important to remember this quiz is intended for awareness and educational purposes only.  It is not a medical diagnosis, official result, or healthcare recommendation of any kind.  To discuss a medical situation or diagnosis, please see a medical professional.

 

Feeling ongoing anger, fear, or guilt


Feeling jumpy, irritable, or easily startled


Feelings very upset or having physical reactions (e.g., heart pounding, trouble breathing, or sweating) when something reminded you of a stressful experience from the past


Feeling detached from people and things around you


Feeling humiliated or ashamed by an individual or a group


Feeling that things are your fault


Feeling stuck on autopilot or just going through the motions it takes to stay alive


Difficulty remembering things


Difficulty concentrating or sleeping


Difficulting doing things that you need to do


Struggling with an addiction (food, sex, alcohol, shopping, drugs, etc.)


Being stalked


Being pressured into sexual activities


Suddenly acting or feeling as if a stressful experience were happening again (as if you were reliving it)


Repeated disturbing thoughts, memories, dreams, or images of a stressful experience in the past


The need to avoid thoughts, people, or situations that remind you of a difficult experience


Loss of interest in things that you used to enjoy


Experienced being stalked


Things you need like money, food, hygiene items, etc. kept from you or controlled by someone else


Living in fear of another person for an extended time

WHAT DO YOUR RESULTS MEAN?

0-50 = It is UNLIKELY that you have Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome.

51-69 = It is POSSIBLE that you have Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome.

70+ = It is LIKELY that you have Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome.

If you are unsure about this result, or it doesn’t seem right to you, I encourage you to check out the signs of Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome.  This is another useful way to evaluate your situation.  Please contact me if you would like to discuss your results.  I’d be happy to give you information about the scoring or explain how your result was reached.

 

When C-PTSD is caused by Narcissistic Abuse it is called Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome.  C-PTSD includes the symptoms of PTSD plus the following:

Difficulties with Emotional Regulation

  • Excessively intense emotions 
  • Unable to feel anything in situations that normally would stimulate an emotional response
  • Difficulty labeling or understanding emotions
  • Avoidance of emotions
  • Persistent sadness
  • Explosive or inaccessible anger
  • Suicidal thoughts
  • Chronically numb
  • Lack of appropriate emotional response in certain situations
  • Unable to manage sudden changes in emotions
  • Struggle to calm after high or low emotions are experienced
  • Emotional reactions disproportionate to the present situation (emotional flashbacks)

Difficult with self-perception

  • Believe they are all bad or fundamentally flawed
  • Take personal responsibility for what happened to them
  • Believe they did this to themselves, so they are unworthy of kindness, love, or help
  • Think they are nothing more than what happened to them
  • Think they are in the way or are a burden to those around them
  • Believe they differ completely from other people
  • Believe that the person they were before the abuse occurred is gone forever

Interruptions in Consciousness and Dissociation

  • Poor memory of traumatic events (even ones previously recalled)
  • Remember traumatic events in an order different than they occurred
  • Feel disconnected from their own body or thoughts
  • Feel unreal or that everything has suddenly changed (Example:  things seem brighter in color, larger, farther away, or like a movie)
  • Lose chunks of time
  • Chronic but often intermittent difficulties with memory
  • Emotional flashbacks
  • Body memories

Difficulty with Relationships

  • Profound feelings of isolation and difficulties knowing how to relate to others
  • Difficulty trusting anyone or knowing who can be trusted
  • Trust too easily and indiscriminately
  • Constantly search for someone to rescue them
  • Unintentionally seek out people who are hurtful or abusive
  • Abruptly abandon relationships that are going well
  • Continue relationships that are hurtful or abusive

Misperception of One’s Perpetrators

  • Surrender control to one’s abuser
  • Believe they will always be under the abuser’s control
  • Believe the abuser knows better than they do what is best for them
  • Experience deep sadness or profound guilt after having left the abuser or even thinking about leaving
  • Deep attachment to the abuser’s charming or public persona
  • Believe that since everyone else likes the abuser, they must be the problem
  • Believe is it shameful to think badly of the abuser or that it will make something bad happen
  • Incessantly longing for the abuser to love them
  • Excessively working for the abuser’s love and approval
  • Persistent anger or hatred for the abuser
  • Recurring thoughts of revenge
  • Incongruent feelings toward the abuser (feeling that dramatically shift and can be polar opposites like love and hate)

Disrupted World View and System of Perceiving the World

  • Difficulty believing (or even hoping) that justice will ever be served
  • Doubt there is any genuine goodness or kindness in anyone
  • Believe that all goodness has selfish motivations
  • Believe they must have come into this world to be one of the ones that are only meant to be hurt
  • Profound level of despair
  • Inability to assign meaning to suffering
  • Inability to believe life can get better
  • Dramatic shifts in beliefs about life (there is reason and meaning to one’s existence vs. life is pointless)

DISCLAIMER:   

It’s important to remember this quiz is intended for awareness and educational purposes only.  It is not a medical diagnosis, official result, or healthcare recommendation of any kind. To discuss a medical situation or diagnosis, please see a medical professional.

Do You Need?

Answers

Are you constantly confused and questioning everything? 

Get the validation and insights you need to unravel your individual situation and clearly understand the truth about what is happening.

Direction

Have you tried everything, but nothing seems to be helping?

Get the personalized guidance, effective strategies, and roadmap you need to confidently choose your next steps.

Healing

Are you realizing just how deeply you have been impacted?

Get the trauma-informed support and direction you need to overcome the impacts and move forward in your life.

Services

Important!

Willow Life Coaching and Counseling, LLC does NOT provide medical services. Please see a licensed medical provider if you need medical and mental health services.

About Me

Bonnie Ronstrom

I’m a certified life coach, victim’s advocate, and pastoral counselor. I specialize in walking toward healing with those harmed by toxicity, narcissism, and spiritual abuse.

My passion is to provide the validation, support, training, and resources individuals and organizations need to overcome the devastating impacts of toxicity and abuse.

Whether you need a one-time consult or a place to heal, I look forward to meeting you and exploring how we can best work together. I work with clients from all over the world through virtual, trauma-informed coaching, Christian counseling (non-medical), groups, training, and consulting services.

Contact Me

Frequently Asked Questions

Who do you work with?

I work with English speaking adults from diverse cultures, countries, and backgrounds.

Christian Counseling

Do you take insurance?

My services are not medical, so they are not covered by medical insurance.

If you didn’t see an answer to your question, the link below will take you to more frequently asked questions.

What does working together look like?

The various parts of us (body, mind, soul, spirit, emotions, personality, abilities, etc.) are so intricately woven together that all aspects of us are impacted when we experience hardships and trauma. For this reason, I believe the most profound growth and healing occur when all parts of us are part of the process.

When we first meet, I’ll ask about your goals and what you hope to gain from working together. Some people have a clear picture of what they want, while others are overwhelmed and focused on surviving today (an expected impact of abuse and trauma). If this is your situation, we can start with your immediate needs, such as helpful information, clarity, a safety plan, or strategies to calm the chaos and anxiety.

I let each person decide how often they want to meet (permitting time in my schedule) and if they prefer to meet via phone or video chat.

As we talk, I discover your personality, experiences, preferences, and abilities. Getting to know you is an essential part of helping me present options and strategies that will be effective for you. I don’t believe a one-size-fits-all approach works.

Part of being trauma-sensitive is that I’m always listening for potential triggers and roadblocks so that together we can develop creative ways to help you keep moving forward and avoid being retraumatized. 

Trauma alters how our brain and nervous systems function. Even when we are no longer in a harmful environment, having “trauma brain” causes physical problems and makes everyday tasks and interactions difficult. An essential part of healing is helping your brain and nervous systems return to healthy functioning. Thankfully, our brains are capable of changing and developing new patterns. Even though trauma is devastating, healing is possible!

People are traumatized when they go through deeply distressing events. When these distressing events are ongoing (such as in the case of Narcissistic Abuse), the impacts are profound.

When there is stress, our brains temporarily change how they function to help us respond to the stressor and recover afterward. Prolonged trauma causes our brains to take on new patterns of functioning. Certain brain areas become overactive while others under-function. These changes are sometimes referred to as “trauma brain.”

Here are just a few of the signs of “trauma brain.”

Lack of focus

Memory issues, Forgetful

Fatigue, Unmotivated

Anxious, restless

Emotionally reactive

Difficulty feeling connected to anyone

Difficulty thinking through challenging topics 

More impulsive

Drawn toward addictions (food, shopping, drugs, researching, etc.)

Sleep difficulties

Loss of hope or difficulty thinking about the future

Jumpy 

Overthinking & obsessing

Headaches, stomach and intestinal issues, auto-immune disorders

Skeptical of everyone and everything

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