Renewing Our Minds Part I: Why Bother?


A Mini-Bible Study for Survivors of Emotional and Narcissistic Abuse

Being in a relationship of any type with a narcissist or emotional abuser is being in a place where our minds are always under attack. It’s living in a world where we are continually bombarded by lies (projection, gas-lighting, smear campaign, etc.).
Once the lies settle in, we automatically start speaking them to ourselves. Things like, “Nobody cares about me. I’m so stupid to fall for that again.” Such repetition sears the lies into the fabric of our minds and then impacts our actions, goals, understanding, health, and so much more.
The Bible tells us that the Truth will set us free from the destructive power of lies. John 8:33 says, “and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” The mental freedom we all want starts with knowing and believing THE TRUTH.
To secure one’s freedom, the Christian must experience God’s light which is God’s truth. – Watchman Nee
Romans 12:2 – “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” Jesus calls us to renew our minds by actively and intentionally replacing the lies with the Truth. It requires us to allow Him to do a complete remodel of our mental landscape. It’s neither quick nor easy and requires that we get real with God and ourselves. During the process, doubts often creep in that make us question if the journey is worth it.
Olympic athletes face many challenges and setbacks, making them wonder if going for an Olympic medal is truly worth all the pain and time they are sacrificing. Once they win the medal, some athletes are disappointed because their win didn’t give them the feelings and future they imagined. However, with God, that’s not the case. We can be sure that reaching His goals won’t be disappointing.
Isaiah 49:23 – “Those who hope in me will not be disappointed.
He promises that a journey to mind renewal is absolutely worth it. But what benefits are we promised?

Read the following passages of Scripture and write down the benefits that come from a transformed mind. Can you find other verses that describe benefits?
Romans 12:2
Ephesians 4:22-24
2 Peter 1:2
Titus 3: 5
2 Corinthians 5:17
Romans 8:5-6
Personal Growth: 
Make a list of all the benefits you can find. Add to your list as you discover new benefits. When you doubt the journey is worth it, read your list. Let it remind you of all the benefits that will come from weeding out the lies and replacing them with His Truth. is an excellent study resource. My favorite part is the ability to see each verse in many different translations.

About the Author

Bonnie Ronstrom

Bonnie Ronstrom

I'm a certified life coach, victim's advocate, and pastoral counselor. I specialize in providing Christian, trauma-sensitive emotional, spiritual, and narcissistic abuse recovery services for individuals, churches, and Christian ministries.